Dog is God and God is Dog

My friend Baptu is an accountant with J Thomas in Calcutta. One day he was sitting on a park bench (a la Aqualung) with his Racing Guides, trying to forecast some winners for the afternoon races. Suddenly he felt something warm on his right foot. Looking down, he saw a stray dog peeing on his leg. After chasing the dog away, Battu finalised his choices for the afternoon. That day he had five winners in seven races!

Recently Baptu sent a mail to our school mail group lamenting the fact that his form has been miserable of late, compared to that fateful day’s. It seems that on the morning of every race day he now goes with his Guides to that same park bench, but alas, no dog has ever peed on his leg again to turn his luck.

This poem was written in response:

(Is this a doggerel?)

Dog is God

How I wish that dog would pee,
Think how happy I shall be,
Instead, I get 'TALLY 4',
Office seems a dreadful bore.

Accounting for those careless fools,
My brain stagnates, my member drools;
My eyes go bumptiy, bumpity, bump;
Umpteen boils adorn my rump.

Vodka offers no escape,
I can do but smoke and gape,
Or chat with endless unknown men,
Mailing Pointers now and then.

So I pray, "Dog, come, please pee.
Make me rich as Croesus be,
Remove this awful, fundless fog."
Dog is God and God is dog.

"O dog, come! Release your pee!
Let the jackpot embrace me,
So I can go sleep like a log."
Dog is God and God is dog.